Friday, February 4, 2011

I Was Wrong

 I really thought Missy would be on board this morning. After all, we WERE going to bake a cake together. Things are no different this morning than any other morning ... and Buster isn't doing anything either.

Somehow they are holding me hostage to the way they want the morning to go. I have to stop caring, but I don't know how. I want them to follow the rules. I want them to be at breakfast. I want them to do what the rest of the family does. I don't want a battle every single morning. I try not to engage, but when the clock hits 8:30 and they are still standing around doing nothing there has to be some consequence and that's where the eruption occurs. 

I have no desire to make a gluten-free cake anymore. They aren't helping me make it. I'll feel bad later when they are watching everybody else eat Sean's regular birthday cake.

What to do....

I'm praying, praying, praying...

4 comments:

Mama in Uganda said...

The Lord disciplines those He loves!

Stay strong in the Lord and in the power of His might.

Praying.

Blessings and love,
Summer

momof4boys said...

This is the battle I had with Ian regularly. Meal time was a huge battle. He wanted it to be when he decided it should be. We battled this like crazy in Calgary. Unfortunately the SS told me I could not withhold food from him even if he did not come home for it on time. What to do? I'm praying for you. Our whole church is praying for you. Julie

Kelly said...

Keep doing what you are doing...love them no matter what. That is all we can do. It doesn't seem to matter what I say, whether I engage or not, whether I punish, whether I praise, whether I ignore, whether I speak in a quiet or loud voice, whether I am speechless ...the only thing that determines Jackson's level of compliance is WHETHER OR NOT HE WANTS TO OBEY.

I honestly believe this. He doesn't have the desire attached children have to please their parents. Everything is about him. period. I have handled almost identical situations in almost identical ways and gotten two totally different responses from him.

This is yet another way he can feel control over me. I know this. I don't like it. It is so frustrating because I am a control freak and children are not supposed to control their parents or their homes. BUT...at the end of the day if I can look back and know I did everything I did in love that is all God is asking me to do.

God has called us to LOVE these children completely and unconditionally. You are doing this...so don't change anything.

GB's Mom said...

And don't feel badly when they miss out on the birthday cake. Their choice.