Tuesday, May 22, 2012


It seems like I have been on the phone a lot. There was a big go around with the hospital policy about releasing a baby to a foster parent. They won't do it without overseeing the foster parents training - about 6 hours - which is mostly sitting around waiting for the baby's next feeding. I guess the last one they released to a foster home in a small town somewhere out in the wilds the foster mom went into panic mode and had no support. Well, this is a  bit different. First off, we are in a big town with a couple of good hospitals and great support. We have social workers and professionals coming out our ears. In fact, my husband is well qualified on his own to deal with infants in NICU and has.  We have a lot of other kids with a lot of other obligations... dropping off and picking up children at school, a toddler that I can't just send off to the local babysitter, etc... So, the social worker (the one on call for our social worker) here went to bat for me and it was decided that I would meet the transport worker from the town where the infant is HALF way. That transport worker just called and told me since I didn't call her back in time she won't be setting up the transport. Basically, "Sorry, Charlie.You blew it."

Well, okay, I talked to so many that I didn't realize she was out of the loop and that she  was a program apart from the myriads of social workers and hospital staff that we were trying to communicate with.

I'm saying, "That's fine, I'll go all the way and  pick him up at the hospital, but I can't stay for hours. And anyway when we called this morning, the hospital wouldn't say if he was being released until this afternoon."

She is insisting that he is being released today, so she knows something I don't, but now she said she's going to tell them he can't be released today because she isn't setting up transport today.

Oh, MY!

Then there's that other glitch, the other policy where they infant must be placed in the car seat for 90 minutes before they release him to see if he can handle the car seat. They say this is standard procedure. Sure makes a lot of sense to me to put a baby in a car seat for nearly 2 hours just before he makes a 2 hour trip in that car seat. He'll be tired of it for sure after a total of 4 long hours.

I don't mind waiting for the child to  be ready to go. I am just not enjoying the RED TAPE created to make life complicated and difficult.

How was it I dropped the ball on calling the transport worker? Well, in the midst of all these phone calls the little Buddy's face swelled up. He looked like a chipmunk with nuts tucked in one cheek. I called the pediatric clinic and got him in even though he was suppose to be on a visit (yep! a whole bunch more phone calls) and then picked up the prescription and took the Buddy to his visit, raced home and picked up the girls for the recital and drove all the way back to town, just in time to wait for the Buddy's transport worker to bring him to me... and I missed half the recital.  I did get to see the Buddy's dad again and I think it is a positive thing for our family to build a working relationship with Buddy's family. Anyway, I wasn't sitting on my hands ignoring the transport lady as is thought.


The latest word is the baby was ready to go, but transport worker is bringing them the car seat to do their little test and she'll meet me tomorrow half way.

Fostering is a riot, just in case you were wondering.


Mood Record: Missy's mood yesterday was excellent. James' mood was reminiscent of days gone by. He was just struggling with transitions. He was allowed on the computer for a few minutes. Christina had shown him a map program (possibly Google) where you can "drive" down the roads in town and see all the buildings,etc... then when Christina needed the computer back for her school work 10 minutes later he couldn't transition away... It happened a few times. He was playing the piano when I suggested that his chickens and ducklings needed to be checked for water and to make sure they were okay and he couldn't transition again. This time he got mad and let all the chickens out of the pen for spite.... and started to act wacky - as in hitting himself upside the head. I closed in on him and was super firm and made him catch every single chicken and put them back. Brianna took over as I had to leave and put him on a bicycle and exercised him hard. He doesn't like gray, rainy days and tends to sit on the couch and do nothing (which sounds kind of familiar).

Today Missy is not grumpy, but quite "RAD" like. She did everything opposite of what she was suppose to. We struggled over the toilet issue, too. James is fine.

****I'm editing this entry to say This afternoon Missy is CRABBY and Grumpy and wailing on the bench. She's mad that the baby isn't here yet. She's spiteful to her brother. She's yelling at me over a cup of water, and actually put some good dings in the bench banging it with  her cup. I finally had a enough of the growling and constant noise, so her new time out is on the swing set away from the house. It's less jarring on the nerves for the rest of us. I actually started her one day later than James on the GSE. Again, they say that toxins being released can cause grumpiness.


Well, I think James and I will go set up that brand new crib. Did I tell you about the crib fiasco? Oh my. Did I waste a lot of time and gas on that one.


Betsy said...

Oh, the wisdom of CPS! He has to sit in the car seat for 90 minutes to see if he can handle it? Seriously? What if he doesn't like the car seat? Will he have to stay in the hospital until he's eight years old and can ride in the car without one?
Where does all this stuff come from? A foster parent's job should just be to take care of the child's emotional and physical needs. They shouldn't have to be a secretary, too.
It's no wonder they have such a hard time keeping and recruiting foster parents.
The fact is, though, despite the brick wall/headache that CPS is, there are many kids out there depending on loving families like yours willing to wade the waters for them. Hang in there!


Acceptance with Joy said...

Actually, this is NOT CPS that made the car seat policy. It's the hospital. Strange, eh?

Michelle said...

Bless your heart, many prayers!

Anonymous said...

The car seat challenge is to make sure the baby doesn't stop breathing or have dangerous heart rate changes. I did postpartum nursing for a few years and every so often we'd get a challenged baby who would do fine in the car seat for 45 minutes and then turn blue. No way to predict which ones, either. We had to keep eyes on the baby for the entire test, so resuscitation was easy, but still pretty stressful. So although it's a pain in the neck (for the nurses, too!), it can save the baby's life. Good luck with the new addition!