Yesterday Vanessa said, "When you discipline Missy it's like, WOW different kid!!"
It's true. She is responding to discipline.
Sometimes it's hard to know when to bring everything to a complete halt and zero in on the behavior. Other times it's obvious. Yesterday was one of those obvious times. Missy had been doing great... then little things started creeping in. An unkind word, a disrespectful look, a lie, an attitude, a manipulation here and there. I correct her. I deal with each one, but somehow she gets more and more bold. It becomes easier to disobey than to obey and by yesterday morning she was doing her thing with reckless abandon. I pulled her aside to talk to her and I let her know that her forewarned consequence of not singing with the other kindergartners on Christmas morning was no longer a warning but a reality. Practice was last night and it was clear to me that her heart was not in the right place. She was out of control and I couldn't trust her. (Besides the fact that she can't carry a tune in a bucket!!)
Well, she flipped her lid.
You would think I would be used to it by now, but it still absolutely makes me sick to see a person that out of control. She screamed, she yelled at me, she was horrible. I put her on the porch - gave her a hat, mitts, coat, boots, and wool blanket. She threw them on the ground. I stood out there and just waited. Her yelling turned to pleading but I made it absolutely clear that she had chosen the consequence by her disregard of my word.
The rest of the morning she was confined to sitting on a folded baby blanket at my feet. She's been very, very good since. It's almost like she's relieved to be reined in.
I wish I could figure out how to get that same effect without her blowing her top first.