Oh dear! I don't know how I'm going to survive this.
I can't teach this little girl ANYTHING! We spent an entire hour trying to teach her the name of the girl in the story we read yesterday.
For the hundredth time....
Me: "This is Mina and this is her papa and this is her little brother Clemmy. What's the little girl's name?"
Her: "I don't know..."
Me: "Her name is Mina and this is her dad and her brother and her mother. What's the little girl's name?"
Her: "Ummm....."
Me: "Her name is Mina. Can you say Mina?"
Her: "Mina".
Me: (Turn the page) "What's the little girl's name?"
Her: "I don't know"...
Gasp! For an HOUR! Groan...
I wasn't going to give up. I thought she could do it. Eventually she remembered long enough to turn the page, but not long enough to read what is on the page . . . She sometimes even called her a boy's name and the boy a girl's name.
This is the way it is with everything when it comes to words and I'm trying to figure this out. She can follow directions, so if I said, "go downstairs to the laundry room and get me the green bowl", she would be back in a flash with the green bowl. She understands. She can remember enough to do what I say, but to recall words and sounds (our little round with blanket vs. blanketet of yesterday is a good example) we are completely sunk. She can hardly repeat directly after me. If I give her a list of choices she can choose the right answer, but if I ask her to come up with the word herself it's not possible. Even if I've been telling her what that answer is over and over for the last half hour she can't come up with it. I'm not really into labels and looking for labels, but I DON'T KNOW what I'm dealing with. I haven't the faintest what this is all about or how to approach it.
I would forget it and let her just be for now, except that I just got a call from the adoption worker and he's pushing the adoption through quicker than he thought he could . . . and if we need financial help with her learning issues it would be good to know right now so it can be part of the agreement.
She's fine for learning to do chores and physical activities. She'll be a hard worker some day. She's smart enough in other aspects of life. It's just that WORDS elude her. It's not a discipline issue. I've ruled that out.
So here's my other challenge.... What in the world do I do with her while everybody is doing school and brother is soaking up the phonics? This kid doesn't entertain herself very easily. She's disrupting the girls at study, she's getting into mischief ( ie, using her scissors to cut up everything in sight) and sometimes getting naughty just for attention. I'm going to have to really think hard and line up project after project to pull out of the box to keep her occupied. Any bright ideas?
So much for teaching twins at the same time.
I'm a little frazzled at the prospects of everyday being just like today ....
8 comments:
I've been lurking on you blog for some time (I really enjoy hearing about the twins progress). I'm no expert but I thought I'd pass along this link because hearing you story about Missy made me think of it.
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/04/26/little-known-disorder-can-take-a-toll-on-learning/
-CR
I thought I would be able to teach my twins together. The one with the lower IQ is doing much better than the one with the 20 pt higher IQ. I can't keep her on task. One finishes about 2 hours earlier than the other with the same assignments. Our state alluded to me that we may have trouble getting help for education because that is "what the schools are for". I don't think she realizes what would happen to these kids if they were in the public school system in my town.
My seven year old girl has a phonological processing disorder that centers around word retrieval. Her IQ is high average, her verbal skills are off the chart, but if she wants to use a specific word, there is a 10- 60 second pause while she tries to retrieve it. The test that pinpointed it was the Comprehensive Test of Phonological Processing (CTOPP).
I don't know if this is possible or not, but could you get a mother's helper? Someone that comes into your home and helps out wherever you need it so you can divide your time?
I have been getting caught up on your blog. Our server is allowing us to be on-line now! So I am taking advantage of it! I just have to tell you I have seen big improvements in the twins! You know, our twins are 8 now and E. usually gets done with school before N. because he is so detailed about perfection. She is zipping through readers and he takes his time. It's funny how they are so alike, yet so different. What you are dealing with is puzzling. Have you taken her to the Elementary school yet this year? I could talk to hubby and see if he knows what is going on in her little head. It's not like she's not trying, huh? It sounds like you both are!I'll keep in touch. KM
This is sooooooo Beth. I too am so confused. I have read and researched and have yet to put a finger on a diagnosis for her. It is frustrating for her and all the rest of the family. Sad. She can't even remember the word for "salt". She will say, "Sauce" every time. Then when I say, "That's not sauce, what is it called?" She will say, "Salsa" every time. And 90% of the time she never retrieves "salt" from her word bank. But if I say, "Get me the salt", she will get the right thing every time.
When you figure it out please post. I wish I could help you. I really do. I'm living this too and it is so frustrating.
Hi,
I've been lurking for quite some time, but felt compelled to post because this reminds me so much of our daughter who was adopted just before she turned 6 (international adoption). We don't homeschool, but after 3 immensely frustrating years of trying to do homework with her or read with or to her, we finally had her tested by an educational psychologist. It turns out that she's ADD-inattentive. (During the testing she told the psychologist that she tries to pay attention, but that there are so many things in her head that it's hard. She has little imagination and is a lousy liar so I don't think this is something she just made up.) She was also diagnosed with a word retrieval problem and a math LD. We're trying a low dose of medication for the ADD so she can focus better and we're working with a specialized tutor on the other issues. We've only recently started so it's too soon to really tell how effective either thing is yet, but I did see some small improvement when she had a book report to do this week.
Perhaps you could have her tested to try to identify the problem and determine what resources she needs. You'll want the financial assistance if she needs some outside help since it doesn't come cheaply.
Good luck . . . you are far more patient than I. I often think I would rather stick hot pokers in my eyes than try to teach my daughter "academics"!
I have children who do this... are you sure that it is not a control issue?? Children who come from "hard places" will often use things like this "acting dumb" as a form of control. I have several children that do this and I have learned when they are doing... very similar to what you described. It does take time but make sure that she is not using it as control... if so she is winning if you are working with her for an hour on the same thing:) I learned this the hard way... we have a 7 year old girl who does this daily and especially with reading and school work. Just a thought :)
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