Feeling Short

It was a pretty good night with the Duckie after he finally went to sleep. He ate at 9 PM and then 2 AM and then 5 AM. SO, I consider that an amazing night after the first two!!! He was really showing his personality last night and I am breathing easier.

I noticed that the Buddy's face is changing so much!! He's thinned down all of a sudden. He's been getting a lot of teeth and he's had the runs and fever, but he stays just as active. He looks like such  a big boy all of a sudden.

It's the twins that have been exasperated. I'm trying not to get discouraged and lose hope. Missy is pushing the limits in every possible manner. For example she turns the tap on without wetting her hands after using the toilet so that people will think she washed. If I tell her to go wash again she will defend herself claiming to have washed and will fight me tooth and nail.  If I ask her to do something she is instantly and  deliberately has a million ways to try and distract me from following through. She is bold and has NO qualms about doing wrong. Most of the time she is doing exactly what I asked her not to do... over and over just like a 2 year old would. It's all day long every 2 minutes something new or something old and worn out. I'm weary of it. While we had company and we had lots of stuff going on it was not so noticeable, but now it is all that she cares to do.

This morning James was called out of bed and he came up bristling. Talk about posturing!! His eyes were shooting darts, his back was arched, his jaw set, etc... and I was just plain sad. I said, James, you come up prickly every morning as if you are angry with me. Are you angry with me?

Yea.

Why?

COLD stare.

God gives us a brand new morning every day and was should be thankful and happy, we could be dead, you know.

Why are you so angry?

I didn't get enough sleep.

Well, does that mean you need to go to bed earlier? You can go to bed a LOT earlier, you know. I wouldn't stop you, but it seems like you wouldn't really like it if I sent you early, either.

NO!

So really, this is your responsibility to choose to be happy and not be angry with mommy since I can't really help it that it's morning again, or be thankful when I send you to bed earlier. You could ask God to help you change the way you are so angry with me every morning.

I DONT" WANT TO CHANGE!

Okay. Go back to your room and don't come out. I'm not going to try and change you.

Sigh.

When he's ready to work with me, he'll let me know.

Nothing I can do but pray. I feel like getting really short with these kids and somehow that doesn't seem to help much.