Monday, March 12, 2012

Carbon Copy

I get them about 4 or 5 times a week.

Emails.

From the twins' bio mum.

They all read similarly. There are few deviations, but occasionally she startles me.

They are really a window into Missy's genetic, and hereditary tendencies. They share a strong resemblance in looks, personality and IQ . . . .  and lack of boundaries.

She always asks for photos which I oblige as often as I can.

Recently she has been asking for my phone number. If she called as often as she emails we would have no rest and so the answer is no.

Recently she asked for our last name.

And more recently she has been asking if the twins could stay at her place for a sleep over.

Today she asked that the once a year July visit be upped to June.

She's not bothered with guidelines or perimeters. In her mind they are "HER babies" still.

To her credit, she thanks us over and over for taking good care of the children and for giving them opportunities she could not.

She has suffered a huge loss and I don't believe the pain has dissipated any. In a sense she is but a child and will always be thus, and so in that sense it isn't really her fault she lost nearly a half dozen children, however she was never capable of protecting and nurturing them. Obviously, though,  she was capable of bearing them....

She is unimaginably capable of incredible chaos
~ as is Missy.

Honestly, I see Missy in every encounter, in every email, in her very personality.  (I don't see James at all).

It's kind of scary to have a thirty-something version of my child out there. I don't have to wonder what could be. I pray that it doesn't HAVE to be.

There is an urgency to affect a major change in the natural course of direction. Is the spiritual, social, economic, cultural, and educational change of environment enough to make THE difference needed in her life? What are God's plans for her and what is my part in influencing her in that direction?

So much to pray about

as worrying never accomplishes anything.

7 comments:

Shonni said...

Interesting the similarities....
Praying with you for healing for her.

Shonni said...

Interesting the similarities....
Praying with you for healing for her.

Sophie said...

Hmmm!

Heredity is a powerful thing but not all powerful. Keep at it. God can be the change, through your family. So glad she has you.

Barbara said...

There is power over hereditary traits and cultivated traits of character in the Righteousness of Christ. It's such good news!

GB's Mom said...

Praying for God's will to be done.

Jennifer P said...

Genetics is an amazing thing. I am also fascinated with nature and nurture. I glanced at my daughter the other day and realized she was doing a mannerism that her birthmother did - an avoidance technique actually. Odd. The reminder was odd. Of things I cannot control or worry about. Well said. Prayers all around.

Mama in Uganda said...

So glad that our God is so much BIGGER than genetics--although I would be lying if I did not say that we speak of it often. Some of our children even have "tribal characteristics...."