Friday, March 2, 2012

Resurfacing of an OLD Behavior

Missy is struggling right now

and I'm not enjoying it..

Something she used to do ALL the time has been back in the picture all week. If I say white she says black. If I say don't touch she will by all means touch it and make sure you know that she touched it. In fact, she'll slap it for good measure. It's very obvious she wants to be caught doing wrong.

I thought organizing her room and getting her settled in would help.
I thought the anticipation of the recital would help.
I thought her success at the recital would help.

Nothing doing. She was doing her best to try and get negative attention before the recital was even over.
Nothing will deter her.

She isn't going to listen and obey and she has a great big sense of entitlement to boot.

Ack! Why do they have all these school holidays??? We can hardly get a whole week of school in without another holiday. I'm convinced homeschoolers have WAY more school days than public school students. Last week was Presidents Day which made for a long weekend. This week winter break started on Wednesday. . . This is so unsettling to kids who crave routine.

I told little Miss Muffet that we weren't going to have that kind of behavior today. If that's what she wants she would have to go back into her bed. And that is where she is. I quietly told her that I knew she was doing on purpose to look to be in trouble and that I was too tired to deal with it today. As I watched her climb back into bed I told her to go ahead and have a tantrum, but it would make no difference. I told her i would pray for her. She quietly got into bed and said not a word. (See, she'll do exactly opposite of what I said * sigh*)


Me and Jesus said...

As a child with attachment issues, she believes she is bad and does not deserve good things. because of her success in the recital she feels like she now needs to prove that she really is "bad". Pride in accomplishments is nit a comfortable emotion for her. Chaos and "being in trouble" are.
New room = pride and happiness in a well attached child.
In an unattached, early childhood trauma child, new room = "uncomfortable emotions" which in turn equal acting out.
My daughters were given a beautiful pink room w/canopies over thier beds. Just a dream princess room. They turned around and bit by bit trashed it. Picking paint off the wall, pulling down canopies, ripping wall stickers off the wall. They loved it but couldn't handle it.

Sophie said...

Oh, the deliberate defiance is the thing that works my nerves the most. I am seeing so much of this in Jackson right now. His is not all the time but any and every time he doesn't get his way. Frustrating to say the least. You are not alone. Hang in there.

Mama D.'s Dozen said...

We are so.not.loving all of the school holidays, as well. Little Miss just got settled into a school routine, and the February and March holidays started.

Little Miss' behavior has escalated so much in the past few weeks that we are in the process of getting a referral for a Psych. Eval. at Children's Hosp. in Seattle. So sad.

Interesting thoughts from the #1 blogger. Hmmm... something to think about, for sure.

:) :) :)

keeperofthefires said...

I totally understand your frustration. We adopted a little boy that did everything the complete opposite of what you asked to the point the teens would have fun with him, say, don't put your shoes on, and he's put them on. Don't wash before dinner, and he'd run to wash. I put a halt to it them reinforcing his bad habits but it took lots of training to undo his habit of doing the opposite of what I asked. God Bless you!