LONG Week

We're going over old ground with both twins at a very intense level this week.

Over,
& over,
& over...

old ground.

Stuff we had made progress on previously.


Lying
disobedience
unwillingness to help
bad attitudes
fighting the morning routine

They do not learn.

Stuck in the old destructive behaviors
knowing they won't get their way... but trying anyway.


I have a sense of compassion for their plight and attraction to foolishness... but I'm also very frustrated that they keep choosing the hard road. When it's this intense I begin to lose my sense of direction, even begin to question my own sanity, and especially theirs. I'm pretty dogged, but I begin to question if it's worth it, if I'm doing the right thing, if we'll ever get out of this deep dark hole.

Steve reminds me that even if they do not learn, if they never become whole, contributing members of society, even if it comes to the place where they sit their whole lives warming a jail cell, it will have been worth it.  They will have been given an opportunity to know Christ and  love. He reminds me that we are to be a part of the demonstration of Christ's character and love to the watching universe... It's true that Jesus gave His all for a foolish, stupid, willful, brain damaged world of sinners - many of whom will NOT choose life everlasting, but death.

I pray for peace in their little hearts.

I have to say, James has taken his responsibility to use the bathroom without being told seriously and I have only had to prompt him once in more than a week. (Okay, so maybe they do learn some things.) It's just disheartening when you ask him to do a simple task and he melts into weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth because he doesn't feel like moving his behind off the floor where he is doing nothing. Even if I told him to go play, it was the same thing, so I chose to have him work. Yesterday was a series of weeping episodes...
"Please, take out the compost,
go for the shovel,
help Vanessa bring up the plant pots,
pick up the branches under the apricot tree,
hang your coat,
pick up your dirty clothes"
after each job was completed things were no better than before
and finally in desperation I said,
"Fine... go empty the hay wagon. It will take you a few hours."

It did. The two of them got half way and it started to sprinkle then they decided they couldn't finish it and the weeping and wailing started in earnest...
but a funny thing,
since the only way to get away from the job was to finish it
they did. 
How proud they were of themselves! And you should have heard the declarations of  how much they enjoyed doing that job. We reminded them that they did a lot of unnecessary complaining, but someday, eventually, they really would learn to enjoy working hard.