Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Unique Situation

It's not impossible for the foster family and the children's family to become friends. It happens. A working relationship grows into something more and it is a pleasant thing, but it also increases the success rates, ~or so they told us when we first started out.

We prayed for this and our prayers were answered.

It's probably not often the foster family and the foster children's family live on the same stretch of road a short distance from each other, so that every time the foster family leaves home they must pass the other family's house.

I'm glad I called early.... before the meeting.

I asked what the probable plan was. She said it was recommended that there be a 4 -6 week transition.

I was stunned. Hadn't we been transitioning for weeks? Mom is ready. The kids are ready. What are we waiting for?

And so I pointed out all that we had been doing. Every single day I call the mom at 8 or so, unless she calls me first, and then we work out the details of what hours she will have the kids and I drive them back and forth -in between her mother's availability to monitor the visits and the appointments she needs to keep.

I shared how the Buddy knows they are HIS family. He loves to go home. He would jump out of his seat if he were not buckled in each time I drive up the driveway shreaking his "hi, HI!"He loves his family.

I was asked to repeat this at the meeting. Grandma also told that, though she monitored everything, the parents have been parenting almost fully. There is no need for a long drawn out transition.

Even still it didn't seem like everyone in the room was on the same page and I started praying that there would be no needless delay for the parent's sake. Slowly the tide of opinion turned. Basically some people just had no idea.

In the end everyone agreed that this is indeed a unique situation.

Starting tomorrow all the visits will be unsupervised. I am to drop off the kiddos first thing in the morning and get them back in the evening before bedtime. I will also watch them during mom's counseling sessions and by the weekend they will start over-night visits.

The duckling has decided he doesn't like the swing anymore. This is the only way he'll have anything to do with it. He wiggles himself down until his feet touch the floor and then he stands there and gazes up at the mobile. Eventually he slips down in a sitting position and he's free of that silly swing :-)
He's happy.

But he's not happy if you buckle him in.


Seven From Heaven said...

We became close with the parents of the first foster kids we ever had. We still have a good relationship with them and I am so thankful. There are other kids that we had here that I wish we could have had that relationship with but it just never worked out. You have made such an impact in those little ones lives.

Diane said...

This is awesome and how foster care should work when the foster parents are willing to go the extra mile and the bio parents are willing to participate and accept others. Great job!

Anonymous said...

A new phase starting for you again... So thankful for the wonderful influence you guys could be for this family and that you will continue to be that... just praying that they will go on from strength to strength and experience complete victory in Christ! You guys are awesome missionaries!!! The self-sacrifice will be rewarded!! A. xx

Carrie said...

So encouraging to hear a success story!

Anonymous said...

I love hearing this positive outcome; gives me a whole new perspective on fostering, it isn't just about the kids eh? but rather the family.
btw... is your house always THAT clean? =)

angela ford said...

Ha HA! Are you kidding?!

We cleaned up so we could take the picture. :-)

{Well, maybe we didn't clean up for the picture, but it happened to be decently picked up so I didn't have to crop out the mess - for once!}

My number one goal once the kiddos go home is to get a handle on the housekeeping! We'll be doing spring cleaning in the fall.