Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Choreography Script?

James is pulling out of his funk!!  YAY!! What a blessing. I'm handing out a little extra TLC to get him through what I know are his hard moments - before they actually get hard in an effort to keep him encouraged, and he's coming back around. It has been a long few weeks, but I can enjoy the Christmas season now.

Missy is, well, Missy. None of us are expecting anything of her right now. Just letting her know the benefits and rewards of happy movement and goals met and ignoring the blatant desire to stir the pot.  She has learned enough to do the minimum in the morning to save herself some grief, but a lot is being left undone and I'm having to be okay with that. There are blessings that come with compliance and there are naturally, downsides to resistance. She feels that. She would love to engage someone ~ anyone, in a power struggle and she goes to great lengths to get us involved, but we're sidestepping and dancing our way through the morning. At the last second, as the bus pulls into the drive, she goes ballistic and tries to do all that she should have done to get ready. She can't do it, of course. This morning she was screaming as I put on her coat, Christina put on her shoes and Brianna was putting her things into her backpack. You can't do anything but laugh at the comedy of it. She has to know it's  gonna happen. It's predictable. She hears the verbal cues I'm offering James so she knows without a doubt. {She resents any cue given her directly and I'm trying to get her softened enough to work with me again, so avoiding all that hardens her heart.)

I'm rewarding cheerful cooperation and turning my face away from disrespect and oppositional stuff and letting life teach it's own lessons with its absence of blessings. Sometimes it takes us a while to figure out just which dance we're suppose to be dancing for the particular moment. . .  If someone could just give us a script!!  It just keeps changing.

1 comment:

Oldqueen44 said...

Oh to know all the required or expected dance steps for their many dances.