My head is full, but it doesn't process real well, or communicate on the fly.... so, while I hope to share so much, I can't promise a thing. I enjoyed the rest and the relaxation.
My family survived and Steve and the girls worked HARD. They are tired and ready for me to take over. They did an amazing job and I am very thankful for their sacrifice in letting me go.
Steve and Missy met me in the city for Missy's Cranial Facial all day appointments at Children's Hospital. Missy was great all day. She loves all the attention at Children's. It's not a drag to go to all her clinic visits. She loves it. The other kids were so glad to see us when we arrived home... Pieter was doing somersaults and dancing. James was thrilled to have me home.
And then I asked Missy to do something....
While away I had thought through a lot of things. I learned a lot and thought I had some good plans in mind. It's easy to forget when I'm gone how it actually is. It's easy to begin to question myself and wonder if I'm part of the problem... If I only did things differently, or responded in such a way... if I just did this, or that, the problems might go away.
This morning was a near disaster. Missy literally threw herself headfirst down the stairs and laid there screaming like someone had pushed her. I don't know how she didn't get hurt. She quite defied my every effort. She would alternate between screaming and stomping and disobeying to laughing at me. I had hoped for a new start with her, but we are right where we left off. I'm going to try to turn things around with what I learned. I'm not going to give up too soon, but I am near tears. May God help us.
The drive home....
I'm listening to "He's Always Been FAITHFUL" full blast!! It's what we have to hang on to.