My head is full, but it doesn't process real well, or communicate on the fly.... so, while I hope to share so much, I can't promise a thing. I enjoyed the rest and the relaxation.
My family survived and Steve and the girls worked HARD. They are tired and ready for me to take over. They did an amazing job and I am very thankful for their sacrifice in letting me go.
Steve and Missy met me in the city for Missy's Cranial Facial all day appointments at Children's Hospital. Missy was great all day. She loves all the attention at Children's. It's not a drag to go to all her clinic visits. She loves it. The other kids were so glad to see us when we arrived home... Pieter was doing somersaults and dancing. James was thrilled to have me home.
And then I asked Missy to do something....
While away I had thought through a lot of things. I learned a lot and thought I had some good plans in mind. It's easy to forget when I'm gone how it actually is. It's easy to begin to question myself and wonder if I'm part of the problem... If I only did things differently, or responded in such a way... if I just did this, or that, the problems might go away.
Um... sigh.
This morning was a near disaster. Missy literally threw herself headfirst down the stairs and laid there screaming like someone had pushed her. I don't know how she didn't get hurt. She quite defied my every effort. She would alternate between screaming and stomping and disobeying to laughing at me. I had hoped for a new start with her, but we are right where we left off. I'm going to try to turn things around with what I learned. I'm not going to give up too soon, but I am near tears. May God help us.
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The drive home....
I'm listening to "He's Always Been FAITHFUL" full blast!! It's what we have to hang on to.
6 comments:
You might enjoy "Oh how I need You by All Sons and Daughters. I am sorry Missy is treating you like this. I was on the receiving end of hateful words and harsh judgments last night on how we dealt with our son from hard places. I am particularly sensitive toward all if the emotions that brings with it today and have a long time scheduled after my kids go to bed tonight to spend time in worship. Focusing on how amazing He is restores my spirit. Not meaning to whine or make it about me, just wanting you to know I am feeling the hard.
Are you thinking of an RTC for her?
no. we are not at this point. The head of her cranial facial team did say he was going to do some research for me...
Angie not sure about this but what if you had someone who was good but strict but alone who would take care of missy everytime she goes into a fit you send her there and just maybe she would not look so badly on the rues of the home. This is like you are sending her away and continuing with your life and it happens everytime she chooses to disobey and she will soon learn that she is only hurting her and that you and the family still continues with a life that she could be a part of if she chooses to. MOM
This was my thought precisely...
My first ever comment from my mom!! Whoohoo!! :-)
I have one person who can take her in a pinch... but she lives 30 minutes away and I can't say that she is strict. It's kind of fun to go there.
If I could find someone who could do that for me, I would. And I will pray about finding someone because it's a good idea.
The rest of our day went fine. I did get her on the bus. And just before supper I took her aside and talked to her about the morning. She accepted the consequence without batting an eye and actually apologized. The consequence doesn't seem like anything... but ten minute time out while everybody is at the table and starting to eat is a big one for her. We shall see what today brings. She has an incentive this morning...
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