Decision

The transition to new foster mom didn't go all that great last night. It was rather rough on the kid and he was tired and should have been crawling into bed, not meeting yet another family. Anyway, he has some major coping mechanisms that kicked in and saved the day.

I pray for him. He needs a strong home and love and everything. We have decided that we cannot be what he needs. He needs a therapeutic home and we are very inexperienced. We have three fabulous girls who never had a trial in their lives in comparison. I look at the previous mom who had to give him up and all her experience and strengths and I know, if she can't do this "who am I kidding?".

The stuff I learned and the acting out that started yesterday helped us to conclude that we are not right for him. One of the things that the social workers felt was in his favor was that we have no little children, but the fact is we live around kids. Yesterday was a good example....there were 15 or 16 kids of all ages in my yard and house, counting mine and the little guy. Later in the day I was working with 30 kids at choir. I live around kids. I work with kids. Our church is full of kids. That's the way I want it.

What I learned in the meeting is all confidential. If you try to guess at what the issues are you will either be generalizing or wrong.:-)

I felt no peace about keeping him, but I had instant peace when my husband said, "We can't do this". Thanks for all the prayers. I felt them. I think our answer is quite clear. I feel bad for the little child, but I think we could do him greater harm by not having the tools that he needs, than if he moves on to a better equipt home.