Friday, March 13, 2015

Finding Balance

It's hard not to wobble around on the balance thing.

At one end we say, "We have to do EVERYTHING possible to help these kids. We can leave no stone unturned. If we come to the end of the journey and we knowingly did not try something that might have improved their lives how could we live with ourselves? They need every chance we can give them."

The other end of the wobble is that allowing myself to become totally immersed in the their problems and being all consumed with trying to help them is not healthy. It's a recipe for depression and despair. It's not a good place for our whole family. I have to have outside interests and a life outside of the kids.

But those outside interests and that other life can't compete with caring for the kids and their needs.

So, finding the balance is pretty much a song and dance...  always jiggling for the sweet spot.

We have some big projects going...  The barn is coming down today and a greenhouse will go up in its spot. I have over 200 organic, heirloom  tomato plants ready to go next week to the feed store. I have 400 + growing for the next shipment. I have 500 other kinds of tomatoes growing for private sale plus other veggies. Briana and I have been making strides in preparing her gardens for providing Youth For Jesus with vegetables this summer. Spring came a 6 weeks early and we were not as ready as we had planned.

 I've been taking care of a quail farm.... think thousands of helpless, suicidal, fragile babies.  Not actually a fun job. My lungs reject all the smells and dust, so I have to wear a mask or wheeze all day. Now it's giving me a sore throat. I have 5 days to go. 

I've been trying to get the kids more involved in community service, so yesterday we worked hard at the community dinner put on by our church and the evening before we were helping at the food bank. I'm just a little tired and grumpy.


Araya Frohne said...

... And I've got 1600 tomato plants outgrowing their pony packs, with nobody signing up to buy this year, and potting soil prices are through the roof this year..!

acceptance with joy said...

Araya and Barbara,

Don't worry People WILL buy your tomato plants. They won't want them quite yet, but they will be planting eventually and they will need good healthy plants. You will have to transplant them and yes, soil is expensive. I am opting for a cheaper organic soil ($6 or $7 a bag) and feeding them fish fertilizer. The feed store is providing all the soil, seed and pots for their orders which helps me a ton. That soil is EXPENSIVE organic soil but the plants are not doing better... they are needing the fish fertilizer too. I am finding no difference in growth and health. So, think about that, maybe get some less expensive soil and feed the plants more nutrients.

ErinL said...

Balance...yes...the best advice I ever got was not to let her mental health trump the mental health of the rest of our family. That's really hard right now but I do take that advice to heart.

~Melissa said...

Whew! You are busy. I feel like a slow turtle when I read about your days. I know I did lots at one time, but I have slowed down. I am working on that...balance for me is a struggle in another area...always a teeter is easy to go too far to the right or left...only with God's help can we figure it out! Deep breath...can't wait to see what you do to create a greenhouse on your barn. We are still making garden plans, so I am enjoying your adventures.

Annie said...

You said it....