It's hard not to wobble around on the balance thing.
At one end we say, "We have to do EVERYTHING possible to help these kids. We can leave no stone unturned. If we come to the end of the journey and we knowingly did not try something that might have improved their lives how could we live with ourselves? They need every chance we can give them."
The other end of the wobble is that allowing myself to become totally immersed in the their problems and being all consumed with trying to help them is not healthy. It's a recipe for depression and despair. It's not a good place for our whole family. I have to have outside interests and a life outside of the kids.
But those outside interests and that other life can't compete with caring for the kids and their needs.
So, finding the balance is pretty much a song and dance... always jiggling for the sweet spot.
We have some big projects going... The barn is coming down today and a greenhouse will go up in its spot. I have over 200 organic, heirloom tomato plants ready to go next week to the feed store. I have 400 + growing for the next shipment. I have 500 other kinds of tomatoes growing for private sale plus other veggies. Briana and I have been making strides in preparing her gardens for providing Youth For Jesus with vegetables this summer. Spring came a 6 weeks early and we were not as ready as we had planned.
I've been taking care of a quail farm.... think thousands of helpless, suicidal, fragile babies. Not actually a fun job. My lungs reject all the smells and dust, so I have to wear a mask or wheeze all day. Now it's giving me a sore throat. I have 5 days to go.
I've been trying to get the kids more involved in community service, so yesterday we worked hard at the community dinner put on by our church and the evening before we were helping at the food bank. I'm just a little tired and grumpy.