Bit
by bit she’s dying. You can see it in
her face, and her eyes…. She’s but a mere skeleton. Her mind is losing its
ability to reason. Her own lies have clouded her reality to the point she can
hardly tell truth from fiction and not a single believable word escapes her
lips. Her beauty is gone. So is her husband:
even her children. Her vehicle is destroyed; her house stands empty… no power,
no water, no garbage service, and her rent has been unpaid for months… If she goes near her mother’s house, someone
will call the cops. Most of her pals are used up and burned out. The ones still
hanging around are as miserably messed up as she is. She is afraid to be alone
at night. She finds herself preparing meals for the kids that aren’t there in
her sleep; sometimes hallucinating and always afraid of drug dealers showing up
to demand payment.
Yesterday
her friend died of a heroine overdose. Someone, who, like her, had recently
been celebrating her recovery from a drug addiction; someone way too young to
die. Is she next?
I
can’t really tell if she resents my urgings to get help. She seldom answers my
calls, but she will respond to some of my text messages on occasion. Usually
she tells me what she thinks I want to hear… that she’s going on a certain date
to the local treatment center and that she’s just waiting for an open bed. It’s always a week away - never today. She lives only for the present moment. She is
in complete denial of the fact that she’s dying. Slowly, but surely she’s
dying. I can see it in her eyes.
I
tell her I love her. I tell her that God loves her. I tell her that He sees her
as she might be, not as she is. He’s just waiting to relieve her of her pain
and suffering and He wants nothing more than to bring healing into her life.
But no
one can force her to make the choice that would change the direction in which
her life is hurtling. I feel helpless and
incapable of doing anything to stay the tide… Everyone does. She is still
alive, though and where there is life, there is HOPE. We are still praying; praying
for a miracle and always looking for an opportunity to show her Christ's love. Sometimes that looks like tough love.
I'm sad. Please pray for her because there is still hope.
“The love that is inspired by our love
for Jesus
will see in every soul, rich or poor,
a value that cannot be measured by human
estimate.
Let your life reveal a love
that is higher
than you can possibly express in words”.
6T 279
3 comments:
I'm praying for her. God is in the business of miracles. Praying for that.
Joining you in prayer.
So hard for all of you who've championed her, isn't it? We're praying that she reaches out for His hope and future. He's all any of us have, but He's enough. --DaleV
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