Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Blessings Chart

There's a couple of new things we are trying with the twins.  Number one is that we have them on the Feingold diet. It's not an easy diet to follow, but it was time to try it. We generally eat very well so it's hard to think a diet might help my kids out any but here goes. The diet removes artificial colorings, dyes, artificial flavors, chemicals and salylcilates from the diet completely. That means in phase one we also remove the fruit and vegetables that have naturally occurring salylcilates such as apples, grapes, berries, cucumbers, etc. it's not all the fruit and veggies. They can have pears and broccoli😎. Phase one last 6-8 weeks and then you begin adding in the fruit and veggies one by one and the other foods slowly over some months to see if there is any kind of reaction. Sometimes kids will have an immediate reaction of melt down with tears or tantrums or they get hyper or other behaviors show up. Sometimes there is a delayed reaction.

We've been going almost a week now with a big mess up on the weekend. So far I can only sense that Missy is calmer. She is not hovering in the red zone of her behavior chart as we have been experiencing. She is still Missy but it's easier to redirect her and she's not screaming or flying off the handle. While we were gone for the weekend she was very willful, pushing for total freedom from parental restraint. She has learned somewhat to be more subtle so the scene is not always obvious to by standees, but if looks could kill.... The harder she pushes against restraint the tighter we draw her close to us. After awhile I get fatigued.

I see no difference in James at all. He's fine when he's fine. He's weepy when asked to do something. He's antagonistic towards his twin and will not be redirected.

And so the new Blessings Chart:.  
Our introduction of the chart went over well with Missy. She had a broad smile and later that evening when reminded that we are here to be a blessing instead of a curse she got it and acted accordingly. James did not accept the chart or its meaning at all. He cried when referred to it to bring out a positive trait and eventually shut down completely and had to be sent straight to bed as it was evening and there was no use working with him. A sense of despair threatens to discourage me over this kid. He's smart enough. He's capable. He could easily see that he has every opportunity to have blessings bestowed rather than blessings removed and he quite clearly makes the choice to give in to all the wrong choices without so much as a slight nod to the possibility of blessings bestowed.  He just did not even entertain the possibility of being a blessing. He doesn't want to be bothered, period. He wants things to be without thought or consequence. Tomorrow is another day. I hope that he thinks it over and changes his mind and does not reject it right off the bat again tomorrow.   I'm trying to put everything in a positive light. 

Monday, October 5, 2015

Standing By. Claiming the Promises

I've been rather mixed up today. First I thought the twins both had dentist appointments at 8 this morning. Glad I figured out last night that the appointments aren't until Thursday. Then I was all prepared for the Department of Developmental Disabilities yearly Social worker visit at ten. I had to hurry my walk and shower and rearrange my schedule, but when she didn't show up I went back and looked and I am exactly a month early.

James is feeling mixed up, too.

I've taken over from Brianna so she could have a break from his mixed up behaviors. I'm standing by watching over him as he is in total shut down mode. He's not saying a word or uttering a sound. He doesn't want to do his assigned work and that is that. It could be a long day.

I've offered to talk him through it but he refuses to communicate. He knows what his choices will lead to. There's absolutely nothing to do but wait, and pray, and claim the promises that God will do something in this kid's heart and life.